Thursday, May 1, 2008

Too Many Time-outs



Chris and I were talking last night about the amount of time-outs we've been giving Alexandra. I was thinking back over the day and wondering if her punishments had been a little harsh for her actions. I expressed how I want to be a really good mom and be patient and loving AS much as I can - I know there are moments when I lose it and will be more in the future. It's the facts.

He told me something he heard on the radio about parenting toddlers, that there is a differen between willful disobedience and just exploring their curiosity. We know that Alex needs boundaries and we also know that we need to follow through and be consistent. The psychologist said that you need to look at your child's heart and know their intent. Alex has a good heart. She is really good natured and isn't destructive. Today both Chris and I were a little more patient and understanding with her and she didn't have to go in any time-outs. Perhaps the lack of sleep has made me irritable because since Samantha was born, Alex has seen the corner atleast once a day, if not more.

Each day is a learning process as a parent, I realize that I won't be who I want to be as a mother overnight. I will try each day to be more patient and remember that my sweet kids are children of God, that I've been entrusted to teach them and love them here on earth. How lucky am I!

7 comments:

MEG said...

I also can completely relate to this, as Dave left for work a while back, he said " Try not to say NO to Claire so much" It's hard to teach them and not just restrict them from everything! Alex is such a beautiful little girl!

Rina said...

I'm new at this- is it ok if I just comment on anybodys blog.
Anyway- my current dilema as a mother is along the same lines. What things should I let slide and what things need to be disciplined?

Your girls are darling and You seem like a wonderful mom!

Elly said...

I learned in a BYU parenting class to ignore their behavior as long as they are not endangering themselves or others. But I find that my interpretation of this has changed over the course of my parenting. As a toddler, my first child was immediately put in time-out every time he hit his brother--which was often. But I find myself nonchalantly watching my third two-year old beat on her older brothers all the time. Maybe it's the difference between older brother abusing younger brother and little sister abusing older brothers--you just don't feel so sorry for those big boys when their toddler sister conks them on the head. Probably, she'll just grow up a little hellion.

kara jayne said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
kara jayne said...

Sorry, I was trying to type way too fast on that last one. Let's try this again!

Each day your patience will be tried. Some days you will do great...some days you won't. It's just life and your doing great!

Jeff and Diana said...

wow i am surprised! alex is naughty? i thought bent was the only naughty one. i agree with elly, if you ignore the stuff that isn't dangerous they stop doing it because they aren't getting a reaction. they get bored and give up.

LACI MICHELLE said...

I think you are doing great with Alex. You're an awesome mom. Keep up the good work.